No Thanks, I’ll Just Read the Book Again

I spent the weekend in The Ranch enjoying the finer things of life like cool basement hangouts and cable television. Jenn had an event this weekend and was unable to make the trip home to the BH with Phil, so we enjoyed our Saturday night without our significant others in the truest fashion: after enjoying some strip mall Chinese food, we curled up in our respective chairs and enjoyed HGTV, TLC and movies on the big screen TV.

After scrolling through all the On-Demand possibilities, we decided to watch Memoirs of a Geisha. Jenn read the book a couple years ago, and I finished reading it a couple of months ago. I like the book and the movie wasn’t all that bad either. I know there was plenty of talk and maybe even a little controversy because many of the actors in the film were Chinese, but it at least looked like the filmmakers were trying to keep the historical/cultural integrity of the book intact. Then again, what do I know…it all looked pretty and shiny to me.

Of course the movie wasn’t exactly the same as the book. I understand that screenwriters must pick and choose and change things to make books more appealing on the big screen. Despite the differences in the movies, I enjoy all the Harry Potter films and the Lord of the Rings Trilogy. I can fully understand why things were left out or changed. Even though I love all of these books and wouldn’t have minded seeing literal screen adaptations, no matter how long, I can at least respect the writers’ decisions (except maybe the slightly corny ending to Chamber of Secrets).

But seriously, people, do you have to change the endings entirely? I won’t give anything away, in case some of you want to see Geisha and may not know how it turns out. It’s not hugely different from the book, but they just kind of cut the story off to make it more of a Hollywood/romantic and happy ending. Another case in point: The Devil Wears Prada. I was really looking forward to the fireworks at the end, but they turned that all happy-go-lucky too, not to mention changing some major plotlines to accommodate it. I won’t even go see The Da Vinci Code. I love Audrey Tautou (don’t even start, Dirk), but Tom Hanks? Seriously? I don’t even want to go anywhere near a theater or the DVD aisle that it’s in. I cringe to think of what may have been altered, especially after reading the reviews.

To top it all off, I’ve now discovered that when I watch a movie based on a book I find myself thinking did that happen in the book? every time something semi-major occurs in the story. This doesn’t make the movie any more enjoyable for me. In fact, it just distracts from the whole thing. With this new revelation I’ve made a decision: if I’ve read the book (with the exception of my beloved Harry Potter), I won’t be watching the movie. If I want to watch the movie and read the book, I’ll watch the movie first. If a movie is good enough to make me want to read the book, I think I'll rarely finish the book feeling disappointed. I know it certainly wouldn't be the case the other way around.